Sunday 10 December 2017

The A to Z of Sex (again)

A few years ago I looked at slang for sex and thought it was about time we delved again in the seedier side of the English language and look at some of the other terms coined thoughout history to describe the sexual act and things related to same. Enjoy! (And when I say "enjoy" I mean this and not that, if you see what I mean.)

A is for ALMANACH, a late 19th and early 20th century term for what the dictionary refers to as 'the female pudend' (and for balance).....

B is for BALD-HEADED HERMIT, the male member.

C is for CHAFER, the act of copulation.


D is for DEMIREP, a woman whose chastity is called into question, and a term first seen in print in Fielding's Tom Jones published in 1749.

E is for EARLY DOORS which, while soccer pundits might use it to mean 'early on', originated as rhyming slang for 'whores'. Hence we'll all titter when hearing Joe Manager speaking of how "The lads did good early doors".

F is for FIRE-PLUG, a young man with veneral disease.

G is for GETTER, a male with great capacity for fertilization.

H is for HANDFUL OF SPRATS, best way to describe this is 'groping'.


I is for IMPALE used to mean to possess (as in being with) a woman.

J is for JIGGLE, the sexual act.

K is for KEEPING-CULLY, a man who thinks he is keeping a mistress in a home for his own personal use, when in fact he's keeping her for anyone she chooses to be with.

L is for LAP-CLAP, conception.

M is for MEDICINE, the sex act (as in take one's medicine).


N is for NUTMEGS, testicles.


O is for OLD ADAM or the male member.

P is for PARSLEY-BED, again the dictionary refers to this as 'the female pudend'.

Q is for QUEER ROOST, maybe 'living over the brush', 'living in sin', co-habiting?

R is for RAMBLER, a woman of ill repute.

S is for SEALS, testicles again.


T is for THRUM, the sexual act.

U is for UPPER WORKS, the female breast.

V is for VIRGINS BUS, the last bus from Piccadilly Corner which, contrary to the name, was largely populated by prostitutes.


W is for WAP, the sexual act.

X, Y and Z had me beaten once again!

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